Sex toys: the undiscussed country
The Atlantic recently posted a story by Andy Isaacson on their website and their Tumblr entitled, "Can a Better Vibrator Inspire an Age of Great American Sex?"
I think it can.
There is often a great irony that happens in most discussions around sex. We, as humans in the 21st century, have greater and more access to information about sex and human sexuality than perhaps any other society. Thanks to studies, discussions and dissertations, as well as pop culture and pornography, we are more prone to discuss sex openly.
But how are we talking about sex, and sex toys?
We're still tittering and giggling while we do it.
Remember the episode of Sex in the City where Carrie and the girls discover the Rabbit?
Sure, the episode brought a certain degree of honesty in the discussion around sex toys -- they're fun, they're sexy, they make you feel good -- but by the end of the episode, the vibrator becomes a joke/crutch for Charlotte, who can't seem to stop using it.
Sex toys are called toys because they are fun. Why do we chastise people who want to have fun, and do it in creative ways? Because maybe they know something the rest of you don't: how to respond to their own bodies and the bodies of their partners in imaginative ways. Sex toys aren't a crutch for the lonely and horny; they are a way of opening one's sexual realm and possibilities.
The key here -- and in the previously stated article -- is in discussing what works and what doesn't work when it comes to sex and sex toys. Designers look into how bodies respond to various stimuli and build better sex toys. Conversely, we, as people who have sex (and consumers of these products), can have discussions as to what we like and what we want. When we can do that, we will all have better sex lives.